Yangbatfest, March 29th – April 1st

YangbatThis weekend in Klah is the annual celebration of the yangbat, a small, nutritious fruit which once saved the life of King Leland II after he accidentally locked himself in a small wardrobe for two weeks with nothing but a pot of glue and 3 ripe yangbats: the flesh of which he devoured, and the pips he used to construct a working key to escape. King Leland II (1796 Р1872) was rather beloved by his people, as he wore comical socks and replaced the usual long, monotonous royal speeches with jokes and the occasional solo mime performance.  Hence, in honour of his fortunate escape, and in recognition of the remarkable fruit, a public holiday was declared. The citizens of Klah will spend this weekend performing the dance of the three yangbats, engaged in yangbat hunts, and generally eating themselves silly.

Happy Yangbatfest.

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Today in Northern Klah: Clouds surround Mount Lobbliwak

Mount LobbliwakThis image of Mount Lobbliwak was taken out of a hot air balloon this morning by one of our contributors, Cyril Hamfinger. As you can see, the long dry spells the North has been unusually experiencing appear to be finally coming to an end. This is perfect weather for catching tasty snikklers, as their feeble eyes only pick up shadows, rendering them practically defenceless in overcast conditions. Dig out your snikkler-catching nets today, and don those snikkler-catching hats in time for the snikkler festival this weekend, Central Whippet, 9am – 3pm Sat / Sun.

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Skoulkintot Bay, Northwest Klah

Skoulkintot-BaySkoulkintot Bay (northwest Klah) is named after the much celebrated native aquatic species Skoulkintot bididdius. The bay was formally called “Grubblewoor Bay” but was changed after six skoulkintot¬†were famously sighted in 1920 by the Queen while she practiced her breaststroke, and one, rather unusually, allowed her to ride on its back. Although the skoulkintot have never been seen in the area since, several tour companies operate “Skoulkintot Sightseeing Tours” and you can purchase skoulkintot merchandise from all local stores.

The skoulkintot, for those who are not familiar with it, is round, scaled (normally purple or teal) and both male and females have a splendid set of moustaches. Throughout history, the people of Klah have enjoyed a great partnership with the skoulkintot, as the people groom the moustaches in exchange for clippings of the hair, which they use as a soft lining for their winter coats. In recent years fewer and fewer skoulkintot have been seen, and as a result winter coat prices have skyrocketed.